And his love for me!

Ananya wonders why I am not actively pursuing him. How do I explain to her. I am a very mundane, no-talent girl. I am a nobody beside a superhuman like him. Frankly, perhaps for the first time in my life, I am humbled, that this person even considers me as a friend. Not only does he consider, he...spends considerable time and energy on me, he dotes on me. And we gel well. Thankfully we never had a misunderstanding till now. I have shouted at him more than once, but he has taken it very calmly and soon forgotten. Nowadays what he shows to me can almost be termed as affection. What, can anybody ask for beyond this? I really don't know about anybody else, but for me, this itself is heaven.

My life is over, I am just a good for nothing person who has to somehow spend the rest of her days. If I can do this much, if I can at least put this person back in shape, and as far as I can see, I am quite successful in that, it will be a good deed done. I have never helped anyone, nobody probably ever benefited from me. People consider me selfish, and there might be a lot of truth in it. But this is the first person I have ever met in life, with whom I don't feel like being selfish. And how to be selfish D'bhai, when I am totally myself with him. I don't need to act. Words flow freely. I just bare my heart before him. We are two sad people who feel privileged to share each other's life and experiences. But that apart, I just don't deserve to stand beside him. His place is somewhere much much ahead of me. I can respect him, love him, but can't demand anything from him.

I practically amaze myself. I spend hours inside my room, wondering about this, shedding tears plentifully and being blissfully happy. Me and my problems will always remain. Let us not involve this angelic person in all that. Let him love me in his own sweet way, and he is free to get away from me whenever he chooses to...