The happiness lingers...

I was happy today, after a long long time, happy, after what seemed like eternity of a subdued, meaningless existence. I am really thankful to my university senior who gave me this job, a new lease of life has been given to me. And then I am really grateful about the socialization and adventure associated with the entrepreneurship course discussion that is held in the American Center every Wednesday. Believe me, achieving this much has been hard for me, almost next to impossible. For I am a really shy girl from within. I am a snail which won’t like to come out of its shell. So, each little thing that I have made possible makes me proud of myself. Right from making the first phone calls to people, asking to help me out in my job search. I am immensely reserved about asking favors, have a majorly big ego and over that, frankly, I don’t have good friends either. In fact somehow I turn up with extremely selfish people and call them friends, I don’t know why I am so stupid. Then, it is very difficult for me to ask for anything whatsoever. Like, first day in the new place, I just didn’t use the rest room – I didn’t want to ask about it (where is it located, can I use the same one that I used as a student, or are there separate ones for teachers and non teaching staff etc etc – on a lighter note, I am using a toilet marked with T (T2 to be precise), now I don’t know whether T stands for Toilet in general or Teacher in particular :D :D…Then there is the usual problem of asking a bus conductor to tell me when my stop comes – I find a lot of apprehension in that too – what will he think, will he think I am a baby or a newbie or a plain idiot? Being in so many different countries have added to the confusion. Am I supposed to eat in the bus, or they will throw me out? I wonder with my tiffin box in hand (ya, mom made me my first dabba today – and as to why I needed to eat in the bus, I wanted to utilize time – didn’t want to waste work time in the university, because I was leaving early for the course today). Can you believe, I was sitting with a dry throat all the time during the discussion, just because I did not want to ask directions to the water filter?? Moreover, neither did I want to go out and explore, because I had to ask the guy next to me to keep my precious seat (I had gotten one in the first row – but later they arranged chairs in two more rows in front of me, as more people turned up). Funny thing is, the guy himself asked me to keep his seat and smartly went out – and I was cursing myself. Thank God, at the end of the session, I was smart enough to locate the water filter myself, else I was already coaxing myself – let it be, we’d take the metro and reach home in a jiffy (it took around 1 hour anyways). Imagine what my condition would have been without water in this hot and humid climate. Yesterday however, it rained again – that too just when I had stepped out for lunch. It was a huge storm, with a power cut (that’s one thing that’s rare in the city – much unlike Bangalore).  But how I loved being part of it – that full throttle wind, that instant water logging, that anxious crowd that has been forced to come to a standstill amid a busy afternoon’s schedule. Frankly, I am loving my city more with every passing day. It is like being in mother’s lap as opposed to the over hyped step mom that Bangalore used to be. Yes, the money was good there, but then I got my PF claim processed – never saw a government job being done this fast, but then remember my paper work too was immaculate, why I even got some spare revenue stamps till now :D :D – lest I have to send the forms again. Well, I do earn a salary of an IT developer with around a year’s experience. But then I am not a selfish person. I was happy when I heard that the kid whom I had recruited as a fresher in my last organization has got 3 job offers, and has cleared the first round of interview for yet another company. I was not jealous, in fact I was grateful that he remembered me and informed me (he's a good kid, he had thanked me in the party he had given to celebrate his joining anniversary - both the kids I selected have been doing good work - I am happy and proud for them). Just that I need to continue the work, else I will die of boredom. Please God, the university environment seems friendly enough, let me get a somewhat permanent job there itself. Please, please God, after a long time, I am asking You for something…won’t You listen to me?
P.S. - Not that I am not scared about this happiness going away - but then I would be such a coward if out of that fear I hold myself back from describing this wonderful feeling.