Towards oblivion!

I have been following my bliss. And seems like the bliss is leading me to oblivion. I am losing my stable relationship...which kept my little bit of hope of finally getting a happy married life, alive. How do I know whether you are the one? True that when I loved you I never kept any condition for this love to get any conclusion. Neither do I have any such intensions today. Only that some questions come to my mind. Why do I see you everywhere in front of my eyes? Why does it become so apparent to everyone that I am neglecting the most important people of my life because of you. Are we really that much close to each other or its all my imagination? Where would all these lead to? I never thought of asking these questions....but perhaps because of the blows I got from Anand yesterday, I am asking you these things. Is there any basis to my dreams. Even to the little extent that you are like me. You will try to cover up my small shortcomings and not highlight them? You will feel in your mind when I need you.....and give some response? Except Rito I have never found a single guy touch the core of my heart. Nobody understood me properly. What is it that binds you and me except our common interest in music and our togetherness, which is only temporary. When we go away from each other, what will be the things that might remind you of me, and me of you? To be a perfect pair, we do need to have several things in common...and our frequency should be in unison. After Anand I am scared, I know what misunderstanding can cause. Today I shall wait so long as you are awake, but you have to give me a sign that you too care for me. Otherwise I shall end this stupidity of mine from tomorrow. Let me die in seclusion, but I cannot worship a person whom my God hasn't created for me.