I long to write about how happy it made me to have a bottle of chilled beer after a year's gap, but then when you are drunk you don't feel like writing...you feel lazy...you feel like...jao yaar kisko sunna hai meri baat, aur kisko sunana hai? Nahi likhni mujhe toh...kuchh bhi..
You feel so lazy that you don't even feel like removing your make up...or brushing your teeth...neither do you feel like falling asleep without doing these chores. But tell you what...all the same drinking beer is associated with such a feel good factor...you just feel...এই ছোট্ট ছোট্ট পায়ে চলতে চলতে ঠিক পৌঁছে যাব - সেই চাঁদের পাহাড় দেখতে পাব - সেই চাঁদের পাহাড় মাথায় যাহার রামধনু রং খেলে দেখতে পাব - ঠিক পৌঁছে যাব ...to translate...with these little footsteps of mine...I shall reach the moon someday and be able to touch the rainbow.
I know man, I know that'd never happen. It is such an unfair world. But then...I don't deserve anything good because of something wrong that I must have done sometime in this life or the previous ones. I must take my punishment with as much dignity as possible. And then I am one person who keeps finding happiness in life, for myself and for people surrounding me. Ya my entries don't show that, agreed, but that has a reason, I have mostly used my blog for venting out my frustrations, for there's no one I can share that with. So far as happiness is concerned, I am all game to spread and share it...
I don't fit in man, I am such a misfit here. I am not what I used to be...not the pampered stylish girl visiting casinos in Genting, not the girl who danced crazily during DJ nights in her previous company during the training days which date back 8 years...I am old now...I don't belong anywhere...also, at the same time I cannot take sarcasms, I am what I am. Good, bad, whatever, to me, in my eyes, I am the best. I hate being judged. And in this world everyone is so so insecure, they are always judging each other.
Whatever...I am simple girl with simple requirements. I am happy when my friends are happy. I am unhappy when my friends don't understand me or hit me in a rather insensitive way and perhaps purposefully, but I don't care. God has never given me what I have wanted...so that's ok. As I know...I deserve this misery, but then I won't let it take away my life. Nobody can take away my happiness if I choose to be happy.
Beer tastes good man...I still love beer...I still love you also...today in the game of two truth and a lie, I wanted to tell - my most favorite person on earth works in the same company...but then it would have been giving you away...you...the chaste, pious, "epitome of purity" you...hai na? How can I do that man...but man I still love beer...and I still believe we'd have made the best couple on earth, only you didn't have the guts. I didn't lose you, you know? You lost the best girl on earth...but then...see the fun...this mishap din't mess up your life at all...it ruined mine...in an absolutely irreversible way...
You feel so lazy that you don't even feel like removing your make up...or brushing your teeth...neither do you feel like falling asleep without doing these chores. But tell you what...all the same drinking beer is associated with such a feel good factor...you just feel...এই ছোট্ট ছোট্ট পায়ে চলতে চলতে ঠিক পৌঁছে যাব - সেই চাঁদের পাহাড় দেখতে পাব - সেই চাঁদের পাহাড় মাথায় যাহার রামধনু রং খেলে দেখতে পাব - ঠিক পৌঁছে যাব ...to translate...with these little footsteps of mine...I shall reach the moon someday and be able to touch the rainbow.
I know man, I know that'd never happen. It is such an unfair world. But then...I don't deserve anything good because of something wrong that I must have done sometime in this life or the previous ones. I must take my punishment with as much dignity as possible. And then I am one person who keeps finding happiness in life, for myself and for people surrounding me. Ya my entries don't show that, agreed, but that has a reason, I have mostly used my blog for venting out my frustrations, for there's no one I can share that with. So far as happiness is concerned, I am all game to spread and share it...
I don't fit in man, I am such a misfit here. I am not what I used to be...not the pampered stylish girl visiting casinos in Genting, not the girl who danced crazily during DJ nights in her previous company during the training days which date back 8 years...I am old now...I don't belong anywhere...also, at the same time I cannot take sarcasms, I am what I am. Good, bad, whatever, to me, in my eyes, I am the best. I hate being judged. And in this world everyone is so so insecure, they are always judging each other.
Whatever...I am simple girl with simple requirements. I am happy when my friends are happy. I am unhappy when my friends don't understand me or hit me in a rather insensitive way and perhaps purposefully, but I don't care. God has never given me what I have wanted...so that's ok. As I know...I deserve this misery, but then I won't let it take away my life. Nobody can take away my happiness if I choose to be happy.
Beer tastes good man...I still love beer...I still love you also...today in the game of two truth and a lie, I wanted to tell - my most favorite person on earth works in the same company...but then it would have been giving you away...you...the chaste, pious, "epitome of purity" you...hai na? How can I do that man...but man I still love beer...and I still believe we'd have made the best couple on earth, only you didn't have the guts. I didn't lose you, you know? You lost the best girl on earth...but then...see the fun...this mishap din't mess up your life at all...it ruined mine...in an absolutely irreversible way...
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