There must have been something to the dread I felt on 26th August. Crap crap crap...I can still hear myself shouting. How much possessive should one be to feel this kind of jealousy? I almost felt like Sridevi in Nagin, after having fought as the snake, when she came back to her human self, gasping for breath, her sindoor smudged. I felt that angry. Why she has to come back between us? Why does anyone for that matter have to come between us. Why can't people leave us alone?
But tell me what to do when nothing is in your hand? I can not take it anymore. I am feeling feverish. There is a limit to what I can take. I can't take his constant denial anymore. I hate the situation life has brought me too...I hate being so weak...so seeking pity.
Life, at least my professional life enters the last lap. It is not easy to retire or to give up when you have always been a fighter. But in any fight someone has to lose :)
And yes, I know not why I am doing this to myself. That is, why I am reading Before I Forget. If he decides to go back to his lady love, then also there is no way that I can go back to him. He has forgotten me for God's sake. May be only way to come to terms with this pain is reliving that pain...
But tell me what to do when nothing is in your hand? I can not take it anymore. I am feeling feverish. There is a limit to what I can take. I can't take his constant denial anymore. I hate the situation life has brought me too...I hate being so weak...so seeking pity.
Life, at least my professional life enters the last lap. It is not easy to retire or to give up when you have always been a fighter. But in any fight someone has to lose :)
And yes, I know not why I am doing this to myself. That is, why I am reading Before I Forget. If he decides to go back to his lady love, then also there is no way that I can go back to him. He has forgotten me for God's sake. May be only way to come to terms with this pain is reliving that pain...
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