I have always been Gulzar saab's die hard fan.
Woh yaar hai jo khushboo ki tarah,
Jiski jubaan Urdu ki tarah...
The afternoon letter was like me telling myself - you are going to end this madness. End it by speaking the truth, sombrely. Keep your ego and self respect intact.
The night letter was like - what did you think, I'd just let go of my best friend just like that? NO WAY...
And the rise in temperature...warmth seeping in an otherwise hopeless wintry night. I guess this only is life. Holding on to your own self, even when the entire world and your own subconscious attempts to change you...
You know - offlining my blog has made me carefree. I can write the truth and examine it clinically without worrying about it being judged.
Like - all I feel if I ever touch my lips is his lips. He talking slowly to me. You want to know why I am sad? I shall explain - in between kisses.
Kisses? I ask...
You won't stop asking me questions otherwise, no? He says.
And I mumble - but then, there'd be only kisses and no explanations.
What is this? Love? Infatuation? Madness? Disease? Desperation? That years of celibacy has brought about?
But then, take away the kisses. I can manage. Please don't take away this human being who understands me.
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